Most years the portion of Pinchos is read during the Shabbosos of Bein HaMetzarim, ‘between the straits’ of the 17th of Tammuz and the 9th of Av.
It is averred that this is due to our desire to read from the specific sections within this portion of the Moadim, the listing of all the Jewish holidays we celebrate in the course of the year, to express our yearning that these days of mourning over the Churban, the destruction of the Temples, too, will be transformed one day soon into days of ‘joy and gladness’, as the prophets promised. (בני יששכר)
But there is something even more significant going on here.
The Midrash quoting Rebbi Levi asserts, that initially before the Sin of the Golden Calf each of the months summer were destined to host a holiday.
In Nissan we celebrate Pesach. During Iyar we commemorate the ‘Small Pesach’, Pesach Sheini, where those who missed out in bringing the first Pesach can make it up on the 14th of this month. Shavuos, the day of the giving of Torah, is observed in Sivan. The summer months of Tammuz, Av and Elul should have each housed the holidays of Rosh Hashana, Yom Kippur and Sukkos respectively. Due to our having sinned they were now all relegated to the month of Tishrei, leaving these summer months bereft of their hoped-for glory. (ילקו"ש פנחס רמז תשפב)
In their place we commemorate: the tragedy of the breaking of the Luchos, and other resulting calamities associated with this day, on the 17th of Tammuz; the folly of the spies and the destruction of the two Temples, on the ninth of Av; the forty ‘days of appeasement’ for the sin of the Golden Calf, that commenced on the first of Elul, culminating with the giving of the second Luchos on Yom Kippur.
The reading of the portion of the Moadim, delineating the full gamut of holidays as we celebrate them today with Rosh HaShana on the first of Tishrei, Yom Kippur on the 10th, and Sukkos on the 15th, are all the product of the initiation of a sin that began precisely at this time, and continued to spiral downward disrupting the natural order of the Yomim Tovim.
In the original plan the progression from Pesach, the exodus from Egypt, to Shavuos, the receiving of the Torah at Sinai, would have continued with Rosh HaShana as the day we were restored to eternal life equal to the stature of Adam before his sin. Yom Kippur would have been an exquisite encounter with the Almighty, similar to the entrance of the Kohen Gadol into the Holy of Holies, culminating with a holiday of indescribable joy, Sukkos, celebrating the privilege we have in being in G-d’s constant embrace.
In the re-formed version, these days now all represent the success of our struggles against a powerful enemy, the evil inclination, and the benevolence of a Creator who accepts repentance and atones our sins, and the joy of that privilege.
There is a command to remember the Sin of the Golden Calf.
Remember, do not forget, how you angered Hashem, your G-d, in the Wilderness. (דברים ט ז)
The Ramban reveals that the intention here is not to remember how bad we were, but rather how, despite our miserable failings, G-d accepted our sincere regret and forgave us. This is a testament, the Ramban emphasizes, to the overwhelming love He has for His children.
The beloved Rebbi Levi Yitzchok of Barditchev extends this idea in novelly interpreting the very verse that would seem to condemn us to long-lasting punishment as proof of our greatness.
After the sin G-d exclaims: “...on the day that I make My account, I will take this sin of theirs into account.” (שמות לב לד)
The traditional understanding of this verse is that when G-d will hold us accountable for our sins He will also apportion part of the punishment on behalf of the sin of the Golden Calf, so that we won’t be inundated with the full consequences of that particular sin in one big wave.
The Barditchover says ‘poonk’t farkert’ - just the opposite.
When G-d observed our audacity to sin even after having experienced the plagues in Egypt, the miracle at the sea, and the revelation at Sinai, He realized how stiff-necked we were and the level to which we struggled internally to overcome our instincts. This not only displayed how difficult it was but it also highlighted and magnified the good choices we had made. These were no slouches, G-d realized, as it were, who automatically followed the traditions of their forefathers. The same mighty battles they fought internally when they failed, were the same drives that should have prevented their declaring, “We will do and we will adhere!”, at Sinai - yet they overcame.
The accounting in the verse refers to those moments when G-d remembers us fondly and desires to bestow blessing upon us, He promises to recall the mighty forces we fight against, as evident in the episode with the Golden Calf, thereby multiplying His appreciation for our choices and the rewards associated with that accomplishment. (עבודת ישראל בלק בשם הקדושת לוי)
The Sefer Chareidim, the great sage and kabbalist, Rav Elazar Azkiri, teaches that the verse that directs us to remember how ‘we angered Hashem’ is a summons to each one of use to personalize it and realize how we too have come up short in our duties to G-d. This should compel us to rise up and engage in a process of self-introspection in returning to His embrace, as He so lovingly exhibited after the sin of the Golden Calf.
There is one caveat however, we must never become apathetic, we must continue to long and yearn for the closeness we are missing. Otherwise we are shamelessly shunning His affection, and guilty of the worst sin - ingratitude.
We are not to mourn over the difficulties we face but rather over the distance that has developed between us and G-d. We pine for the days when we can sense once again His closeness, His inspiration, His joyous love for us.
We must ache for those ‘missing days’ of summer.
As a child, for over eight years, I was fortunate to spend the two months of summer in a wonderful overnight camp. The days were filled with great activities, terrific friends and a very devoted and talented staff. Despite the many distractions, the highlight of the summer were the two visiting days when my very loving parents came to share in my happiness and shower me with candy, games and other assorted goodies, and most significantly, their affection.
On visiting day the regular camp activities ceased in order to devote our attention in spending time with our parents and family.
I remember very clearly waiting very anxiously at the camp gate to finally catch a glimpse of my father’s car pulling into the parking lot. I recollect even more acutely those days when my parents, due to circumstances, didn’t make it up to camp for visiting day.
During these three weeks we experience something very similar. Whereas during the rest of the summer we are distracted by our music, games and fun, we are tasked with diminishing somewhat our routines and focus on what we are truly missing.
We wait like a child, wondering when will our mothers hug us, after a month hiatus from that special warmth, when will our fathers raise us high in their arms, gleaming with pride and joy in their eyes.
My friends, it is visiting day.
When will Hashem finally show up? What gifts await us when He arrives?
Are you desperately waiting at the gate thinking about the sweetness that is in store for you?
If you long, He will arrive!
באהבה,
צבי יהודה טייכמאן
