Login  

Register  

Parshas Ki Seitze - The Punishment of the ‘Wayward Son’ vs. Yishmael’s Salvation

By Avraham Cohen

Posted on 09/16/16

Parshas HaShavua Divrei Torah sponsored by
Dr. Shapsy Tajerstein, DPM - Podiatry Care.
(410) 788-6633

If a man will have a wayward and rebellious son [ben sorer u’moreh] who does not hearken to the voice of his father and the voice of his mother, and they discipline him, but he does not hearken to them … And all the men of his city shall pelt him with stones and he shall die, and you shall remove he evil from your midst …  Deuteronomy 21:18,21


When the water of the skin was consumed, she [Hagar] cast off the boy [Yishmael] beneath one of the trees. She went and sat (some distance away, saying) ‘Let me not see the death of the child.’ G-d heard the cry of the youth and an angel of G-d called to Hagar from heaven and said to her, ‘What ails you, Hagar? Fear not, for G-d has heard the voice of the youth [kol ha’na’ar] in his present state [ba’asher hu sham] … Then G-d opened her eyes and she perceived a well of water; she went and filled the skin with water and gave the youth to drink.  Genesis 21:15-17,19


Here is a gem by R’ Yissocher Frand, shlit”a; thanks to R’ Eliyahu Singer for forwarding it to me. It is presented here with many emendations:


This week’s parsha contains one of Torah’s most perplexing set of laws: the ben sorer u’moreh, the wayward and rebellious son. He is a young man who has begun on a path of life that our Sages say will eventually lead him towards destruction and bloodshed. The Talmud says, “Let him die while innocent rather than die after having committed a capital offense.” The Gemara summarizes the situation with these famous words: “ben sorer u’moreh needon al shem sofo – the wayward and rebellious son is judged based on what will be his end” [Sanhedrin 68b].


Rav Eliyahu Mizrachi zt”l asks that this implementation of justice based on projection of future evil deeds appears to contradict a key principle that the Torah has already introduced in Parshas Vayera. When the young Yishmael was dying of thirst in the desert and crying out, an Angel appeared before his mother, Hagar, and told her “Do not fear, for G-d has heard the voice of the lad b’asher hu sham – i.e. in his present state” [see above, Genesis 21:15-19].


The Midrash relates that the Ministering Angels came before the Almighty at that time and protested: “Master of the Universe! This person (Yishmael) – whose descendants are destined to kill your children – for him you miraculously provide a well and water to save his life!?”


Just Imagine what this world would have been like if Yishmael had not survived this episode. Imagine the absence of suffering that not only the Jewish people would have been spared at the hands of this nation, but the absence of suffering that the entire world would have been spared by the descendants of Yishmael! With the death of young Yishmael, we would have been saved from so many tzoros – if only the well in the desert had not miraculously appeared to save Hagar’s young son.


The Midrash concludes by telling us G-d’s response to the Ministering Angels: “Yishmael; is he currently guilty or innocent?” The Angels concede that at this point in his life, he is innocent. The Almighty then explains to His angles that “ai’nee dan es ha’adaom elah b’sha’ato I judge people based only on their current status.” That is the meaning of the enigmatic words in our pasuk, b’asher hu sham – in his present state.


Rav Eliyahu Mizrachi zt”l thus presents his conundrum: On the one hand, in the case of the wayward son, he is to be killed based on his future actions; but, on the other hand, in the case of Yishmael, we see that G-d will only judge a person based on their present status! So, which one is it?


The Sefer Bei Chiyah suggests an answer to the Mizrachi’s question, based on a Gemara in Rosh Hashana:


The Talmud presents twin hypothetical scenarios: Two people who have the same disease; and two people who are accused of the same crime and sentenced to the same capital punishment. Despite these pairs of individuals facing virtually identical situations, it often turns out that one of the sick people is cured while one dies; and one of those sentenced to death is executed while one escapes punishment. The Talmud asks: How is it that in these situations, one person lives and one person? And the Talmud answers: “This one prayed and was answered, while this one prayed and was not answered. This one prayed a tefilla shleima (a ‘complete’ prayer) and this one prayed a prayer that was not complete” [Rosh Hashana 18a].


We might ask – how does the Gemara know that the dichotomy of outcomes was due to a qualitative difference in their respective prayers? Maybe one person survived because he had many merits in his celestial bank account, and maybe this other person died because he had many debits in his heavenly ledger. How can the Gemara so confidently attribute this dichotomy of fates to the quality of tefillah? The Bei Chiyah says we see from this Gemara that if a person prays a ‘complete prayer,’ he has the capacity to survive no matter what “credits” or “debits” he may or may not have based on past actions.


Now we can see a solution to our original contradiction: The reason Yishmael was saved was not only because he was judged based on his current status – because, as we see from ben sorer u’moreh, a person may be executed based on future actions. However, by Yishmael another factor came into play: namely, that G-d heard es kol ha’na’ar – the voice (the prayer!) of the youth. Simply put, Yishmael davened. Therefore, in spite of the fact that he was destined to kill so many of the Jewish people and should have been “judged based on his end,” his power of prayer triumphed over everything else.


Thus, a person’s fate is entirely dependent on the power of prayer – everything else is irrelevant. In the Talmudic passage brought down above, the person who lived may have had terrible sins on his record, but the power of ‘complete’ prayer tipped the scales away from any of those negative elements sullying his record. On the other hand, a person who may have had merits, but did not invoke his power of prayer at the time of crises, may not survive.


We should seriously contemplate this answer as we enter into the weeks leading up to Rosh HaShannah, the Yom haDin. On who davens with deep kavana, with his whole heart and soul, may be answered and saved; while one who davens an ‘incomplete’ prayer, lacking sincerity and deep concentration, may face grave consequences. May the Almighty hear our cries and finally bring this bitter exile of Yishmael and Edom to an end.


Some Elul Thoughts


We are now in the month the Elul, the month preceding Rosh Hashana. The initial letters of the Hebrew word ‘Elul’ [ALEF • LAMED • VAV • LAMED] spell out the well-known verse from King Solomon’s Song of Songs [6:3]:


Ani L’dodi V’dodi Li – I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine


On this pasuk, R’ Shmuel Brazil, shlit”a writes:


If we make sure that the first part of the relationship,


“Ani l’dodi • I am my beloved’s” - is in place and in its true form;


then Hashem will reciprocate with,


“v’dodi li • and my beloved is mine”


granting us selichah and kapparah, forgiveness and atonement,


and a good & sweet New Year.


****************************************


Rabbi Dovid Winiarz zt”l, The ‘Facebuker Rebbe’, posted on his website:


Apologizing does not always mean


that you’re wrong and the other person is right;


it just means that you value your relationship more than your ego.